Unbeautiful
by Nerdified Elf
Summary: Song-fic to the song Unbeautiful. Kelsey wonders what went wrong and why Ren lied.  SPOILER ALERT! If you have not read Tiger's Voyage, do not click on this!


**I know what you are thinking, "WHAT? Nerdified Elf, publishing a finished story?" Well there's a first for everything! This is my first one-shot. Hope its good. **

**SPOILER ALERT! Scene from Tiger's voyage.**

**I was reading Tiger's Journey and I cried into my pillow at their break-up. The next day, I was listening to random songs on my computer and found this song. Thought of Kelsey and Ren instantly!**

**I do not own the Tiger's Curse series or Unbeautiful by Lesley Roy**

"If you do this… if you leave me again… there won't be another chance."

Another fat tear plopped onto my cheek. He took a step closer, reaching out his finger to the teardrop. Our eyes met and my heart thumped horribly in my chest. I loved him so much it hurt._ How could he do this to us?_ It felt wrong. These words he was saying were false. I knew it in my mind, but my heart was in pain regardless. _My_ Ren would never say these things to me, but was he still _my_ Ren? Had he really changed that much?

Ren studied the teardrop as he rubbed it between his finger and thumb. He looked up, his blue eyes hardened sapphires. "I won't need another chance. I won't be seeking you out again."

_Maybe he wasn't really my Ren anymore. Maybe I've been fooling myself all along, wishing and hoping for something I'll never get back. _Angrily, I said, "You'd better be sure, because if I commit myself to Kishan, I won't leave him for you. It wouldn't be fair to him."

Ren laughed wryly. "I consider myself duly warned."

He walked off as I whispered, "But I'll still love _you_."

If he heard me, he didn't stop. I stood at the rail for a long time trying to figure out how to swallow again. Emotion clogged my throat, and I could only inhale in shallow breaths.

The next night was chilly. I would know, since I spent some of it on top of the wheelhouse in a little spot no one else knew about.

I was sitting on a silk cushion I had woven out of the Scarf. I found a small portable radio in one of the numerous cabinets in the wheelhouse.

I had managed to tune into a station that played American music. Low static underlined the songs, but if I turned it up loud enough, I didn't notice it.

**Don't hang up. Can't we talk?  
>So confused, it's like I'm lost<br>what went wrong? What made you go?  
>Don't pretend you don't know<br>this is me - I'm unchangeable**

The beginning was a bit staticky, and then it cleared. I dropped my head against my knees and listened to the song in silence.

**When did we fall apart?  
>Or did you lie from the start<br>when you said it's only you?  
>I was blind, such a fool<br>thinking we were unbreakable  
><strong>

All the memories rushed through me: Me and Ren, our first night as a couple, him sticking poems in my bag, and his intense eyes never leaving mine as we danced on Valentine's Day.

**It was you and me against the world  
>and you promised me forevermore<br>Was it something that I said?  
>Was it something that I did?<br>'Cause I gotta know what made me unbeautiful  
><strong>

I sniffed, forcing myself to keep the tears from falling. Songs like this always seemed to know exactly how you felt.

**I've been told what's done is done  
>to let it go and carry on<br>and deep inside, I know that's true  
>I'm stuck in time, stuck on you<br>We were still untouchable  
><strong>

I remembered the overwhelming sense anger and sadness when finding out that Ren had purposely blocked me from his memories. I'd waited all those months, shaping my anger into energy, preparing myself to fight Lokesh only to have Ren forget.

**It was you and me against the world  
>and you promised me forevermore<br>Was it something that I said?  
>Was it something that I did?<br>'Cause I gotta know what made me unbeautiful  
><strong>

Even afterward, we still tried. Did it mean anything to him? _"Always" _I had said. _"My kamana" _He had said.

**Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, 'cause I'm only dreaming  
>Get out, get out, get out, get out, get out of my head now<br>because we're much better altogether  
>can't let go<br>**

I would try, but I knew it was hopeless. I wouldn't be able to let him go; at least all of him. He would stay with me forever.

**It was you and me against the world  
>and you promised me forevermore<br>Was it something that I said?  
>Was it something that I did?<br>'Cause I gotta know what made me unbeautiful**

His words replayed in my head; "_You _are not right for _me_. I'll find someone else. Someone… _prettier_." I thought of all the times he had called me beautiful. Apparently he had lied to my face.

**it was you and me against the world  
>and you promised me forevermore<br>Was it something that I said?  
>Was it something that I did?<br>'Cause I gotta know what made me unbeautiful  
>made me unbeautiful<strong>

A single tear escaped. I started as Kishan settled down next to me. He reached out and wiped away my tear, just as Ren had. _"This is _Kishan. _Not _Ren." I thought. I smiled weakly at Kishan and he pulled me into him, wrapping me in his arms.

I promised myself they would be the last tears I ever cried for Ren.


End file.
